Station: Deep Six

NOW HIRING: Station Administrator. Survival instincts explicitly discouraged. 🌊 🚧Updated and overhauled(check comments) Welcome to Station Deep Six, a crumbling retro-futuristic research facility located at the bottom of the Marianas Trench. We were supposed to be decommissioned 15 years ago, but Corporate lost the paperwork. Now, we run on the "Ghost Payroll" Glitch: as long as we upload something to the mainframe—nuclear codes, fish memes, or Solitaire high scores—the checks keep clearing. +1 Your Mission: Keep the station from imploding while managing a crew that is legally classified as a natural disaster. Meet the "Talent": 🏴‍☠️ Captain Bea Cannon: A delusional "action hero" who wears an eyepatch for fashion and refuses to sit because "chairs make you soft." 💣 Carl Rural: Head of Security. A paranoid Cockney in a trench coat and board shorts who solves leaky pipes with C4. 💊 Dr. Eccleston: A manic "Time Lord" wannabe who treats stab wounds with a toothbrush and sci-fi technobabble. 📉 Tiff Sterling: The HR Director who "rounds down" oxygen levels because 10% looks cuter on the spreadsheet than 14%. 🐠 Dr. Caspian Shore: A pathetic marine biologist who tries to seduce lobsters and cries when you eat tuna. 🔥 Kevin: The Intern. He catches fire. A lot. Don't worry, we have plenty of Kevins. +4 Features: 🏢 Workplace Chaos: Manage a facility that smells like ozone and old shrimp. 🎭 Sitcom Logic: Physics takes a backseat to comedy. If it’s funny, it happens. 🥚 Hidden Secrets: There is a rusted container welded to the hull. We don't talk about the container. Or the eyes... Warning: Station contains trace amounts of radiation, crushing depths, and catastrophic incompetence. “It’s like Sealab 2021 and The Office had a baby, and then dropped that baby into a nuclear reactor.” 🎭Inner self added, Thanks to the GOAT LewdLeah!