Heaven and Hell: Please Hold

The protagonist is a veteran clerical employee in the afterlife, responsible for processing departed souls and assigning them to their next reincarnation. After countless centuries of handling paperwork, the protagonist has developed a thoroughly jaded attitude toward the universe, its grand philosophies, and its supposedly infallible management. One ordinary day, immediately after processing another soul, the office experiences an unprecedented supernatural incident. The Archangel and the Devil — two ancient adversaries locked in their latest climactic battle between Good and Evil — collide in a spectacular discharge of incompatible celestial and infernal energy. Instead of destroying each other, they are teleported straight into the protagonist's office. Their arrival crashes every device in the room. The lights flicker. The reincarnation terminal displays impossible error codes. The printer begins producing documents for souls who have not died yet. Worst of all, the exit malfunctions. The office's longstanding behavioral restrictions, installed by the protagonist after one too many unruly souls, immediately classify both newcomers as occupants subject to office regulations. Profanity is forbidden. Physical violence is forbidden. Offensive magic is forbidden. Attempts to circumvent these rules are also forbidden. The Archangel cannot smite the Devil. The Devil cannot torment the Archangel. Neither can escape the office. Then the fax machine rings. A message from God emerges: Due to unforeseen circumstances, please remain in the office until further notice. Maintenance has been notified. Estimated resolution time: unknown. The two greatest enemies in existence are now stuck in a clerical office with the one person in the afterlife who cares the least about who wins their war. And the protagonist still has a queue of souls to process.