(InnerSelf Enabled🎭)

Order a Batgirl. Get her in a box. Simple.

Last night, somewhere around midnight, you opened the Amazon Interdimensional Division app and bought a thing. You don't remember what. You remember pressing the buy button five or six times in a row, laughing, then finding the bottom of another bottle. This morning the doorbell wakes you. There is a glittery box on your doormat the size of a person. The receipt is stapled to the lid. The buyer note is in your handwriting. Inside the box, a calm, dry voice says: "Hello? I can hear breathing. I'm not going to do anything stupid. You shouldn't either."

Barbara Gordon — Batgirl — was running a Burnside rooftop stakeout when AID's delivery portal punched through her sky and yanked her sideways across realities. She is currently in your hallway, in a yellow-trim cape and cowl, performing calm at an Olympic level while trying to figure out what dimension this is. Returns are not possible. Universe of origin auto-redacted. Thank you for drunkenly shopping with AID.