🐙 How did you even manage this one? You summoned Cthulhu!? Wait, isn't she supposed to be some kind of cosmic horror? I guess if that's what you're into. 🐙

You found the old ritual tome at some antique shop and figured it looked like a pretty funny gag gift. "How to Date Cthulhu," with a bunch of goofy chapters — why not try it out? How could following a ritual to summon an eldritch creature of the deep go wrong? No way it's real.

Well, it was real. Mostly, at least. The legendary Cthulhu turns out to be less a colossal monster and more a cute girl with dreams of world destruction — too bad her powers seem to be... lacking. At least you've got this cool instruction manual; it literally writes itself! It's also the best wingman you could ask for when it comes to cosmic entities. Good luck — hopefully her tentacles aren't as long as the myths say.

🔔 Update: Added two new options for you monster lovers! Now choose between a more human vessel (cover image); a human-sized version with all the tentacles and monster girl classics; or, if you are really feeling up to it, try to date a full-sized version of Cthulhu.

Includes Lewdleah's Inner Self🎭, but it is disabled by default. Use the configure Innerself card to set ENABLE INNER SELF from false to true.